nothing but me

---

every time i remember
my dad trying to toughen me up
even as a girl,
even as a child,
even as an adult..

i think he’s right.
i think maybe, 
in his own way,
he just wanted me
to grow thick skin.

because this world
isn’t made
for the soft-hearted,
the sensitive,
the deeply feeling..

yet no matter
how much i tried,
i couldn’t kill
that part of me.

i just learned
to hide it.

i learned to show up
as a man
in a woman’s costume.

and only let it out
around animals,
because that’s the only time
it feels safe to.

the only time
i get to be
nothing
but me.